I Like Big Trucks And I Cannot Lie
Monster trucks with their thunderous engines revving their way into South Africa for the first time – Who says “No” to catching that?! So in the spirit of expanding our horizons, Yuven and I booked our tickets to Monster Jam waaaay in advance, and waited in anticipation until the booming roars of trucks could be heard at Durban’s Moses Mabhida Stadium.
In the days leading up to Saturday, 20 April 2019, we were like 5-year-old kids eagerly waiting to go on an excursion. We even had a game plan: We would get to the venue with sufficient time to grab a boerewors roll, beer, and candied nuts before navigating our way to our seats. Which is why when we departed from Suncoast Casino, the dull hunger pangs in our tummies motivated us to take that walk that much faster.
Moses Mabhida Stadium, drenched in Durban’s glorious sunlight, stood magnificently in front of us. We were greeted by waves of people tumbling over each other in an attempt to get to their designated seats first, whilst others were held back by “security” (Explained later on) after prohibited items (Literally snacks!) were found on their person and/ or bags. We ran (Well, walked briskly) around the entire stadium, holding hands like pre-school kids hardly containing our excitement. For an event of such a magnitude and with the amount of sold-out tickets, food vendors appeared scarce, with the few that were scattered around dishing up the same food options. But we were unfazed because despite the lack of candied nuts, we swiftly spotted footlong hotdogs and 500ml cups of beer – Sorted!
Finding the entrance that would take us to our seats was quite simple thanks to Compu-ticket. The show was due to begin at 6pm pronto so we decided to get our food in advance so that we would be already seated before the thrills began. We stopped at the food vendors outside our entrance, and if we had to collectively group the families in line it would be a “swarm”. A swarm of hungry and agitated families. But we had just over an hour before the show began so we grimaced and stood in line.
The food and beverages on sale were reasonably cheap: Wors rolls for R25, chicken burgers for R35, and 500ml cups of beer for R25. And so with our minds made up and stomachs ready, we waited in line.
And waited.
And waited.
Families around us began yanking crabby, hungry children to their seats after a little announcement was made saying that the food was sold out. Yuven and I were flabbergasted. Sold out? As in insufficient food prepared to cater for the number of tickets sold? No. No catering company could be that unprofessional and downright useless? Alas the announcement was made again, but we persevered. If we could not get some grub, then we would at least get something to drink.
And still the minutes ticked by and then it began to drizzle. Five minutes before the show began we were still third in line – Hangry and astounded at the sheer lack of care by the bodies moving monotonously behind the counter serving starving patrons. The bodies taking the orders were calculating the totals in their mind and/ or on their cellphones, and then all scrambling to a central point in which change was dished out by another body. The guy filling the beer cups appeared to be in a daze – He stood there for the entire time with his mouth slightly open (Maybe in shock at the large groups of ravenous people staring right at him) instead of filling up the beer cups that were selling out by the dozen.
Promptly at 6 p.m. we heard the distinct roar of the first monster truck – Yuven and I were almost in angry tears. After 10 minutes we finally reached the front, got our lazily-filled beer and one pitiful chicken burger, and dashed out into the steady drizzle to find our seats. We both had not been to the stadium before so we were unfamiliar with the seating arrangements and had to ask for help. The “security” posted throughout the venue, however, seemed much more confused than us ticket-holders. When we eventually spotted our seats on our own, we were unable to get to them because they were in the middle of Moses Mabhida’s super narrow rows. And so we decided to just wait above the seating area for the intermission so that we would not disturb anyone. Until another “security” popped up claiming that we could not stand on the perfectly empty ledge that did not block a single soul. After explaining our dilemma, the confused look crossed her face as well and so we just decided to apologise profusely to those already seated whilst we tried to manoeuvre our way to our seats.
And when we reached our seats they were spectacular! The row closest to the showground and in the middle so that we could see every glorious thing! And then the first few large raindrops came, and with the same flabbergasted look we realised that our R450-per-person tickets did not come with a shelter. Soon enough Durban’s sky opened up dropping mighty large rain drops directly onto us. Yes, our super awesome seats were right in nature’s path. Of course we didn’t mind the rain, but we just could not fathom the planning of the event. Our families that also attended the event had to be moved to new seats after the area they were sitting in began filling up with water leading to cleaners having to remove it with buckets. Unprofessional much!
Despite being drenched to our skins, we were blown away by the monster trucks. The drivers, also unfazed by the torrential downpour, did not hold back. We were enthralled by their controlled driving on the muddy ground, breathtaking air flips, and soaring over the strategically placed ramps. Our eyes were as wide as saucers as we took in the magnitude of their size and the seemingly impossible stunts they were pulling off. Their resounding roars only added to our excitement as we sat on the edge of our seats anticipating which truck would topple over after attempting another daring stunt.
The show itself was shorter than expected, but filled with enough stunts to keep us South Africans satisfied enough to want to buy souvenirs. Every second person we saw seemed to have a souvenir, so it was obvious that I would want one too – Yuven obviously indulged me. From the souvenirs that we did see, there were bags filled with popcorn, mugs designed to look like trucks, t-shirts, mini trucks, and plush toys. When I chose my mug, I did get a slight shock at the price which I naively thought would be cheaper. But at R150 for a mug from a show that was brought to South Africa for the first time, we could not refuse. And it included a complementary snow cone. We assumed payment would be in cash only and went in search of an ATM. When we asked a “security” for help, the response we were given was “I don’t know, it’s the first time I’m working here”. Hmmm…. Anyways, it turned out that payments could be made by card.
The bathrooms were brimming from the time we entered the stadium until the very end, so finding a relatively quiet one after having beer proved slightly difficult. Once again “security” seemed to be completely clueless about the location of toilets, ATMs and exits which we felt was super worrying because they obviously were not briefed about safety, how to react in an emergency situation, or how to handle large amounts of people. It was almost as if they had floated down on parachutes, landed at their designated spots, and just responded robotically. The power they had assumed when confiscating snacks (which in the end was in demand due to the complete lack of food) disappeared when help was requested from them. In any event, the toilet I visited was surprisingly clean despite the thousands of people that frequented it.
In a nutshell, the idea of Monster Jam itself was phenomenal. We relished the experience, and would definitely attend the next time they are in South Africa. On the flip side, the deplorable catering and food stalls together with the completely pointless presence of so many “security” and police officers would have us thinking twice. We now understand why so many of the sought-after events make their debut in only Cape Town and Johannesburg, but as usual that’s just in my opinion 🙂
Featured image courtesy of http://joburgwest.getitonline.co.za/2019/02/27/eight-monster-jam-trucks-heading-sa/#.XPgr7dQzZdg
